מסכת מגילה, דף יג.
ר' יהושע בן קרחה אמר אסתר ירקרוקת היתה וחוט של חסד משוך עליה
Rabbi Joshua the son of Korcha said: Esther was green, but a string of kindness/righteousness pulled on her. (Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Megillah, 13a, my translation)
This is an explanation for her double name: Esther and Hadassah. Hadassah means myrtle, ergo, Esther was green. There are much nicer explanations, though, earlier on the same page. I don't know why they felt that they had to include this particular one! Here are some other explanations of both Esther and Hadassah:
ויהי אומן את הדסה." קרי לה הדסה וקרי לה אסתר תניא ר"מ אומר אסתר שמה ולמה נקרא שמה הדסה? על שם הצדיקים שנקראו הדסים וכן הוא אומר (זכריה א) והוא עומד בין ההדסים. רבי יהודה אומר הדסה שמה ולמה נקראת שמה אסתר? על שם שהיתה מסתרת דבריה שנאמר אין אסתר מגדת את עמה וגו'. ר' נחמיה אומר הדסה שמה ולמה נקראת אסתר? שהיו אומות העולם קורין אותה על שום אסתהר. בן עזאי אומר אסתר לא ארוכה ולא קצרה היתה אלא בינונית כהדסה. ר' יהושע בן קרחה אמר אסתר ירקרוקת היתה וחוט של חסד משוך עליה
"And he brought up Hadassah." She is called Hadassah and she is called Esther. It has been taught: Esther was her proper name. Why then was she called Hadassah? After the designation of the righteous who are called myrtles, for so it says, "And he stood among the myrtle trees." (Zecharia 1:8). R. Judah says: Hadassah was her name; Why then was she called Esther? Because she concealed [masteret] the facts about herself, as it says, "Esther did not make known her people or her kindred." R. Nehemiah says: Hadassah was her name. Why then was she called Esther? All peoples called her so after Istahar. Ben Azzai said: Esther was neither too tall nor too short, but of medium size, like a myrtle. R. Joshua b. Korha said: Esther was greenish but endowed with great charm. (Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Megillah, 13a, translation by Gates to Jewish Heritage)
Seriously, is that last line necessary?
This is much worse, though. Not necessarily for the content, but for the way it was taught to me when I was 16.
I don't have any sources with me, but for some reason, I learned this passage in high school, and only the good Lord (and maybe a rishon or two) knows why, but this was explained to me as: Women don't do anything while having sex, so it isn't adultery and Esther didn't have to martyr herself rather than commit it. I mean, they just lie there, so it's okay. Not that Esther was specifically not actively participating and thus it wasn't adultery--I think that's a fine explanation. No, I was told that this is simply an inherent feature of female sexuality: קרקע עולם. (I have no idea where else this phrase appears or what else it might mean. Maybe I'll look into it later.) It's things like this that make me question whether it's prudent to spend tens of thousands of dollars to send one's children to Orthodox Jewish day school, even a fairly liberal, intellectual one, if this is the sort of think they're going to be taught.
מסכת סנהדרין, דף עד:
והא אסתר פרהסיא הואי? אמר אביי אסתר קרקע עולם היתה
And wasn't Esther married [to Mordechai] in public? [I.e., how could she sleep with Ahasuerus? Isn't that adultery, which is one of the three sins that one should die rather than commit?] Abaye said: Esther was the earth [i.e, passive, so it wasn't adultery]. (Babylonian Talmud, Tractate Sanhedrin, my translation)
So much of what bothers me about Judaism is the way that it's taught--often to the detriment of women. You can't excise every text you hate from the canon, but (a) you don't have to teach it to every kid who passes through day school and (b) you don't have to teach it as if there's no problem with it from our perspective.
When I was seventeen or eighteen I remember complaining to a rabbi/friend that I just couldn't deal with Orthodox people any more. They were idiots. They were wrong. They didn't make me want to be a part of them. He said, "Ah, but it's the people, not the Orthodox Judaism that's bothering you. Don't give up on the Orthodoxy just because the people piss you off." (I don't think those were his exact words, but that's the gist of it.) I didn't find it very convincing. What good is the "Orthodox Judaism" if you can't stand the people? What is a religious movement if not its community of people? It's not like I could be an Orthodox Jew in isolation. Luckily, I've met other individual Orthodox people since then who, like me, hesitate to align themselves with Orthodoxy. And we're all Orthodox together--but not like those Orthodox people. I've also met a lot of non-Orthodox people who share my personal, moral, and Jewish values more than most Orthodox people do, and with them, we are mostly just Jewish together.
Hopefully, Purim itself will come and work some of its sweet, sugary, super heroine magic on me and I will remember the splendiferiousness of this chag.